Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Things I Love

I am trying to remember the things I love.  I keep talking to other women about the fact that we are geared to put others' needs, opinions, desires, wants, etc. before our own and so many of them identify with it. 

I asked my husband this question the other day:  "What is my favorite restaurant?"  He paused for a long time and then answered with one of our favorite places in Los Angeles, where we lived over 6 years ago.  Then, I said, "no, what is my favorite restaurant here?"  He couldn't answer.  But more telling is this - neither could I.

 I have a lot of opinions - about politics, people, religion . . . and I am never afraid to offer them, but I have been surprised to realize that I have put all my opinions about things in every day life to the side because it is easier to concede to the desires of those I take care of and interact with on a daily basis.  Because my husband loves music and while I love it also, I don't have the same passion he has, I have let him control the music choices - in the house, in the car, on our computer - I don't even have a single song loaded on my iphone.  Because we have children, if we go out for a meal as a family, we choose a place where we know they will be happy and there will be choices for them.  Because my husband has very definite opinions about restaurants and I tend to be a little easier to please in that arena, if we go out without the kids, I generally let him pick.  I let him bring a couch into our house that I hate to replace ones that I really liked because it just didn't seem worth the fight. 

I'm certainly not looking for sympathy here.  And I don't intend to paint a poor picture of my husband.  My point is just that I forgotten who I am and I forgotten what I love - in everyday life.  I'm on a quest to find those things again.

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